hello.
my mother named me james. but i do not like that name. call me ry.
i am a very small boy with a very big heart. my wrists are thin and my eyes are wide.
my skin is marred with beautiful and unique scars. my collarbones stick out and my hips do too.
i am waiting for someone to hold me in their warm arms.
i like very simple things.
freshly cut grass. cloudy skies. ice with milk. cracks in cement with flowers growing inbetween them. doing that weird giggle that i make. falling in love. having my heart broken because it makes me stronger. breaking someone elses heart in turn. being broken is beautiful. iced coffee. tea with honey. strawberries and watermelon with salt. being told i am not a bad person by my brother who surprisingly loves me very much. watching connor grow up. being able to type without having to look at the keyboard. knowing i will be okay. knowing she will make me feel okay. loving everyone with everything i have (even if it hurts me a lot). making silly faces in the mirror. singing softly on the phone and having someone say it is pretty. crying with someone. filling up the empty space in my heart slowly. songs that make me feel far away. lime green walls. veins. the sun. the smell of charcoal. driving to san diego while it rains and pressing my cheek to the cold glass of the car window. getting told i am pretty with and without clothes on. being touched. being loved. whisper. scream. wonderful startling eyes. hold your breath.
love me for who i am. not who you want me to be.
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"I wanna be a lion.
ReplyDeleteEh, everybody wanna pass as cats.
We all wanna be big, big stars,
yeah but, we got different reasons for that.
Believe in me, 'cause I don't believe in anything,
And I wanna be someone to believe,
to believe,
to believe.
Yeah."
): i was listening to that song like, 5 minutes ago. and maybe it was just because it said "lion", and "cats", that i thought of it, but it totally reminded me of you D:
tu me manques.
je t'aime.~